Religions comparison not changed after 2014 “Black Friday”

(Photo Credit: Wikimedia Commons)

“Turkey Day purchases are traditionally the time of year when millions of people go heavy on their wallets, credit cards and, inevitably, their smartphones.

This year’s Thanksgiving Day spending battle has, once again, been won by Android mobile users, which is to say that the company based in Mountain View, California has managed to bag a hefty profit yet again.

“The numbers have been crunched by the IBM Digital Analytics Benchmark, and they say that 25% more was spend on Turkey Day purchases by Android users, than those who use Apple. In fact, Apple-onians spent, in average, $95.25 per order, whereas Android-ers went all the way up to $118.57.

“Considering the fact that Black Friday sales were launched a day early this year as a trial run, those who wanted to get their shopping done without leaving their home realized they didn’t even have to be in front of a computer. More than 50% of all browsing and online shopping on Thursday (Black Thursday, that is) was done via mobile device.

“Director of IBM Smarter Commerce, Jay Henderson, says the increase is “pretty dramatic”. He added: “compared to 2010, when the number was just around 6.5%, the 2014 statistic is absolutely staggering. In fact, last year on Black Thursday, online purchases made 25.4% of all actual sales. This year, the number is 32%.”

Right after the results of the sales analysis were released by IBM, Apple, Inc. called for an urgent management meeting. Newslo’s insider, who attended the meeting, says that “the leading executive was infuriated because of the results.”
“For the love of Steve Jobs, can’t you idiots do anything right?!”, he shouted, and continued: “must I do everything around here?! The legacy that Steve has left us should be a religion to you, morons; it is to me! And, by Steve, if cutting off heads is what it takes to get ahead of the competition, than that’s what we’ll do!”, the executive finished furiously.
Apple’s next move remains to be seen; whatever it is, it won’t be pretty. That much is certain.


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